Journals41
Newest
Update
1 min read
i live.
Now, before you all get "woo yay wb" on me...
I prolly won't be active until 'round Christmas. Art's improved, though uninspired and yaddayadda so i have nothing dA worthy. Pitty.
Talk to y'all soon, love and kisses~
<3~S-R
Now, before you all get "woo yay wb" on me...
I prolly won't be active until 'round Christmas. Art's improved, though uninspired and yaddayadda so i have nothing dA worthy. Pitty.
Talk to y'all soon, love and kisses~
<3~S-R
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In
Toby, the angelic dog he is, chewed on and thus broke mt tablet pen. Isn't he a GOOD BOY?!?!?
anyway Im pissed. Until i either get over it or school starts i don't think i'll be drawing anything... not even lil boredom doodles on paper.
So yeah have a good summer.
anyway Im pissed. Until i either get over it or school starts i don't think i'll be drawing anything... not even lil boredom doodles on paper.
So yeah have a good summer.
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In
but here it goes.
I'm only writing this because y'all deserve to know why i'm never online and don't really talk to anyone when I am.
My whole life has revolved around achieving perfection. I want only to be the sweetest daughter, most caring sister, and compassionate friend to everyone. I stay up until 3:00 in the morning to see my mom who works very odd hours. I search the house over for change to walk to the store and get dad a cupcake when i accidentally ate his. I always try to be kind and understanding towards my friends, and always stay on their side even when I think they're wrong. I work around the clock to make sure my dog didn't leave a mess for someone else to clean up. I fix everyone a cup of coffee in the morning before they get up. I babysit my nephew even though people look at me like I'm a slut because they default me to being his mother instead of his aunt. I keep my mouth shut when I disagree with someone, and let them have their way. I tidy the house while my parents are at work. I do whatever i can to make everyone around me a little happier. I try my damned hardest to make myself the perfect person to whoever. I do all this because I love them and I take pleasure in brightening someone's day.
Unfortunately I've recently discovered that I'm very far off from perfection. Until now I never knew how much I was wasting my time.
Because now all that I do is utterly ignored. Unless I mess up. Unless I fall short of that damn perfection. It's infuriating that for everything I do, every way that I let others walk all over me, the only thing anyone has to say about me is what I can't do.
I can't be a straight A student when I get 2-3 hours of sleep a night.
I can't always hang out with whatever friends i still have because I get NO social interaction. I'm always at home 24/7.
I can't house break the dog when no one wants to make the first step.
I can't train the dog not to do something when my father is so paranoid that he sees discipline as cruelty.
I cannot be a perfect "Sonic artist" because there is ALWAYS something that someone will point out as OOC.
I cannot agree with everyone because I am an individual with my own fucking opinion.
I can't be everything to everyone. And you don't know how much it kills me. It's like my life's goal to have only a positive effect on those I'm with. And I loathe myself for my shortcomings.
I know it's pointless but I also know that I shouldn't cry myself to sleep because I sick with myself morally after I ate a cupcake. Something there is just wrong.
Making others happy makes me happy. but then shit happens and someone isn't perfectly happy and I become miserable because I blame myself even when it has nothing to do with me. Even over the littlest things. I always blame myself, and I make myself physically sick with guilt when even one person isn't happy.
So do forgive me, but I'm doing my damned best. I'm becoming less active online because anything and i mean ANYTHING at this point could set me off.
God bless you all and see y'all later, k?
Love!
I'm only writing this because y'all deserve to know why i'm never online and don't really talk to anyone when I am.
My whole life has revolved around achieving perfection. I want only to be the sweetest daughter, most caring sister, and compassionate friend to everyone. I stay up until 3:00 in the morning to see my mom who works very odd hours. I search the house over for change to walk to the store and get dad a cupcake when i accidentally ate his. I always try to be kind and understanding towards my friends, and always stay on their side even when I think they're wrong. I work around the clock to make sure my dog didn't leave a mess for someone else to clean up. I fix everyone a cup of coffee in the morning before they get up. I babysit my nephew even though people look at me like I'm a slut because they default me to being his mother instead of his aunt. I keep my mouth shut when I disagree with someone, and let them have their way. I tidy the house while my parents are at work. I do whatever i can to make everyone around me a little happier. I try my damned hardest to make myself the perfect person to whoever. I do all this because I love them and I take pleasure in brightening someone's day.
Unfortunately I've recently discovered that I'm very far off from perfection. Until now I never knew how much I was wasting my time.
Because now all that I do is utterly ignored. Unless I mess up. Unless I fall short of that damn perfection. It's infuriating that for everything I do, every way that I let others walk all over me, the only thing anyone has to say about me is what I can't do.
I can't be a straight A student when I get 2-3 hours of sleep a night.
I can't always hang out with whatever friends i still have because I get NO social interaction. I'm always at home 24/7.
I can't house break the dog when no one wants to make the first step.
I can't train the dog not to do something when my father is so paranoid that he sees discipline as cruelty.
I cannot be a perfect "Sonic artist" because there is ALWAYS something that someone will point out as OOC.
I cannot agree with everyone because I am an individual with my own fucking opinion.
I can't be everything to everyone. And you don't know how much it kills me. It's like my life's goal to have only a positive effect on those I'm with. And I loathe myself for my shortcomings.
I know it's pointless but I also know that I shouldn't cry myself to sleep because I sick with myself morally after I ate a cupcake. Something there is just wrong.
Making others happy makes me happy. but then shit happens and someone isn't perfectly happy and I become miserable because I blame myself even when it has nothing to do with me. Even over the littlest things. I always blame myself, and I make myself physically sick with guilt when even one person isn't happy.
So do forgive me, but I'm doing my damned best. I'm becoming less active online because anything and i mean ANYTHING at this point could set me off.
God bless you all and see y'all later, k?
Love!
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In
Boobs = faves
1 min read
And i guess the size and/or character i put them on doesn't matter either 0.0 seriously nothing in my gallery has ever gathered faves/views to fast as shadowed-rain.deviantart.com/a… i doubt it's the quality, being iScribble crap.
so the next few deviations i submit will have the word boobs in the title, just to see of my theory it correct. either that or there's more Nicolette fans out there than i thought!!
so the next few deviations i submit will have the word boobs in the title, just to see of my theory it correct. either that or there's more Nicolette fans out there than i thought!!
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In
Concept Xortia
1 min read
I'm planning on doing alot of work in detailing the flora and fauna of Xortia (if your not familiar, it's the planet my fursona Seleluna hails from). If anyone has ideas for freaky alien creatures and somesuch, feel free to share. I have a few animal designs that i hope to pan out, but help is always welcome. For you Avatar lovers-> i designed Xortia to be alot like Pandora, before i ever even heard of the movie. Kinda disappointing since now everyone'll say that I'm ripping off the movie.... oh well.I was thinking about making a group for this world, though I'm not sure yet. Just let me know if it sounds halfway interesting.
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In